The Seinfeld Opposition - by Sam

Reflections from SAM

In recovery, one of the topics that I hear over and over again is the need for change.
Change your thinking. Change your friends. Change your life. Change your attitude.
The definition of change is to make the form, nature, content, or future course of
something different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone.

As a person in recovery, I have a good idea of what would happen if I didn’t make a
decision to change on a daily basis. If I do what I always did, I would immediately
fall back into my old habits and addictions. This is the definition of insanity—doing
the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

The hard part about change is it causes discomfort and takes work—two things that
don’t come easy to me.

When I first became sober, I knew that I had to change but didn’t know where to
begin. My best thinking got me a bed here (at Salvation Army) and if I wanted to
stay, I had to change not just some things but almost everything. I felt like George
Costanza in the Seinfeld episode “The Opposite.”

In this episode, George is lamenting that his entire life has gone wrong. He says, “My
life has gone opposite of what I would like it to be. Every instinct I have in every
aspect of life has been wrong.” He says. “I always order tuna on toast with cole slaw
and a cup of coffee but nothing has worked with tuna on toast. I should try chicken
salad on rye, untoasted with a side of potato salad and a cup of tea.”

Just then, Elaine notices a woman looking at George and suggests he do something
different and go talk to her. But George says, “Elaine, bald men with no job and
no money who live with their parents, do not go up to strange women and start a
conversation.”

Jerry intercedes, “Here’s your chance to do the opposite. Instead of tuna salad on
toast and being intimidated by a woman, order chicken salad untoasted and go right
up to her. If every instinct you have is wrong, try doing the opposite, right?”

So, he begrudgingly does. “Excuse me, my name is George, I’m unemployed and live
with my parents.” To George’s surprise the woman says, “Hi, I’m Victoria” and a
conversation ensues.

Seriously, this is how I felt.

Last year, I was five months sober and called my sponsor to say, “I thought this
change would be easier as I go along. I’m five months clean why is this getting
harder?” He simply replied, “I’ve been sober 14 years and still trying to change.
There is no finish line here. Change is a constant process and to remember you are
either moving closer to a drink or drug or you are moving farther away.

I like what Will Rogers said, “You might be on the right track but you will just get
run over if you just sit there.” This is life in recovery. In order to change our lives,
we first have to change our thinking. Sometimes, I have to think about what I’m
thinking about and do the opposite. Am I dwelling on negativity, self-pity, other
people’s opinions of me, or am I meditating on what God says about me—sober,
creative, talented, well-able, can change, will change?

I like the way the apostle Paul wrote the Ephesian believers, “…put off your old self,
which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires;…. and put on the new self, created
to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.”

The only mistake you can make today is to give up on making change.

Change

The following blog is from : Quiet Times Reflections

God created me at my core a unique individual, just as he has you, for his purposes and to bring him glory. Period.

His purpose and plan may change from time to time, day to day, and perhaps even moment to moment; our response can be interesting, adventurous and yet confusing and defiant—not on God’s part but ours or more specifically mine.

Just the time I get comfortable it seems he changes the game plan AND without consulting me!

Could this ‘change’ be the refreshing everlasting water[i]constantly flowing in and through me rather than stagnant and unyielding water I tend to gravitate to? At heart, I am a very private person and like my time and my ways. But I’m coming to realize God did not create me for…well, me. That is not to say we don’t need quiet and/or alone times to refresh and be rejuvenated. I’m talking about the avoidance of others just because I don’t feel like interacting or feel like changing my plans.

Could it be that chance meeting was an ordained crossing of two paths God orchestrated for encouragement, healing or salvation? Perhaps it was to be the exact moment in time for God’s glory to be revealed to one who is desperately seeking someone higher than their thoughts and ways. Could it be God wants to teach me rather than the person I come across something or open my eyes in an area I have shut?

I recently read that God could have created us with incorruptible bodies and morally flawless character but instead he created us out of dirt—clay. Why? So it would be absolutely obvious that anything of eternal value accomplished through our lives is from God and not from us[ii](2 Corinthians 4:7). 

So in the end, it’s realizing my comfort is not God’s purpose for my life. OUCH!! Obedience and surrender are not popular topics nor are they to come from a defeatist attitude. Obedience and surrender are costly. They are also at the heart of understanding and accepting who God is, why he created me and how he takes great pleasure in my partnering with him for the amount of years he has given me to live. 

So at times it is with kicking and throwing tantrums that I surrender. And with a grateful heart God doesn’t treat me as my sins deserve[iii]but rather with grace he loving opens his arms and walks beside me--wherever that may be. Am I to do anything less for those around me?

What about you? Where are you in your process or should I say progress?

---

[i]http://www.youversion.com/bible/John.7.38.nlt

[ii]Becoming A Vessel God Can Use by Donna Partow (pg 78)

[iii]http://www.youversion.com/bible/Ps.103.10.nlt

Humility?

America calls itself a Christian nation. If all who call themselves CHRISTians (Christ followers) would truly be emulating the Rabbi, the Teacher Jesus Christ-the one whom we derive our name, what would we look like? Make it personal, what would you and what would I look like?

If Jesus were physically walking with us today what would his followers be called to do?


Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but are yourself lost or destroyed? If anyone is ashamed of me and my message, the Son of Man will be ashamed of that person when he returns in his glory and in the glory of the Father and the holy angels. (Luke 9:23-26NLT)

Our lives would be marked with humility… The cross was an object of humility, pain, death, scorn and degradation. Andrew Murray wrote, “The call to humility has been too little regarded in the Church because its true nature and importance has been too little apprehended. It is not a something which we bring to God…it is simply the sense of entire nothingness, which comes when we see how truly God is all, and in which we make way for God to be all.” [i]
Jesus is not asking or suggesting but mandating, take up your cross daily and follow me.
“But I warn you—unless your righteousness is better than the righteousness of the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees, you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven!” (Mt 5:20NLT)
It is a daily surrendering, a daily acceptance that I am nothing without grasping…without taking hold of the truth that I am because of Jesus Christ.
Only God’s cleansing can generate a heart of true humility.

Our lives would be marked with hospitality… Our homes would be marked with hospitality not “Alarmed by XYZ Security Company”. It isn’t the size of our homes, the stuff in our homes, or the impressive spread on the dining table. Hospitality begins and ends with humility. Becoming a servant at heart with arms ready to serve and receive those who will never be able to repay. It is serving in Super-Sized portions grace and mercy, acceptance and forgiveness.
Only God can motivate a life of hospitality and it starts with humility.

Our lives would be marked with change…Priorities would change. We would not allow our wealth to identify us. Nor would it own our hearts and time. “turn from your selfish ways..” Lk 9:23; Mt. 19:21-30
Only God can motivate a heart of change and it starts with humility.

Our lives would be marked with unity…There would be no denominational divisions, barriers or jealousies Luke 9:49-50. We would stand ready to help, encourage and defend a fellow brother not matter his affiliation.
Only God can motivate a heart and desire for unity and it starts with humility.

Our lives would be marked with a holy pride…There would be an awareness of holiness, respect and marvel when sharing this message of hope, redemption, restoration, life, healing and deliverance. We would be a compass to those desperately seeking Truth pointing them always to the Father.
Only God can motivate a heart filled with His holy pride and it starts with humility.

Jesus didn’t call us to build dynasties; he called us to build relationships. This is the difference between being the organized church and being the body of Christ. I believe this is the mark of a CHRISTian…a follower of Jesus Christ.

A work in progress,
Kay

[i]
Humility by Andrew Murray, pg 14-15

Clearing the Fog

Revolution.

That's what we are talking about.  But I'm not quite ready to fully dive into what exactly I'm talking about.  But maybe I can clear out some of the fog from yesterday's post.  First of all, a definition.  From this point forward the following definition is how I am referring to revolution.  

nonu -  a sudden, complete or marked change in something

I am not inciting anyone to pick up arms, start fights, or anything of that nature.

This is not another Occupy Wall Street type movement.

That said this isn't going to be easy.  It's not going to be all flowers and sing-a-longs.  Those who participate will be misunderstood.  Antagonized.  Insulted.  Possibly even feared and hated.  I can not promise the absence of pain or suffering.

What I can promise, is hope.  And it's not even my promise to make.  It's already there.  Waiting.

Hope that things can be different.  That chains and repressions that have been unacknowledged or ignored for decades, and longer, can fall away.  Hope that tomorrow can be a better day despite the challenges that may come.

Hope.

So, as a question today I leave you with this.

Are you willing to endure what may come?

grace, peace & HOPE

-Bear